A Doctor Visit That Made Me Cringe

It's taken me two days to even get down to writing about this, guess such was it's impact.

The visit itself, was my dad and me going to see an Orthopedic Surgeon at KIMS, under reference of friends. My father has a knee problem, severe enough to need knee replacement surgery; but during preparation for the surgery he was declared 'not fit' due to the discovery of a major heart aneurysm. This was about ten months ago.

At that point he was faced with a critical decision of a 'yes or no' to an open heart surgery, and after indepth discussion with a senior Pulmonologist, he decided against. They both agreed that at 82, it wasn't the most sensible thing to do. 

It was a life altering time. There was the initial scare of learning about the aneurysm (which he describes as now sitting on a ticking time bomb), plus having to deal with a growingly painful knee, dealing with the limitations of not being able to go out of home....not even to the terrace to feed the birds which had become one of his favorite times of day.

Major shifts........physically, psychologically and emotionally.

Over the ten months I've seen my father spend time and energy exploring and finding ways and means of handling the knee pain....starting from permutations and combinations of painkillers, using a walking stick, ayurvedic thylums, Jaipur braces, imported calipers, cartilege enabling injections. I've watched in admiration at the focused, painful, yet brave ongoing effort.

It's in this context, that this visit happened.  Each foray outside of home is now like an adventure for my father, in terms of effort, paraphernalia and pain. Yet high on hope, as we heard this doctor knows of a stem cell based injectible, we went to see him.

Now for the experience of the visit itself.

We enter and begin to tell him the issue and context, and within the minute we hear "If you've decided against surgery, I don't know what you expect.......there is no other solution"

"the knee is like a machine, there is wear and tear and whatever else you do, it will keep getting worse and the pain will keep getting worse...even if you sit in one place it will deteriorate, I don't even know what you people think"

"You've taken a choice against surgery, you seem to think you know better, why did you even come to see me.........you think I have a magic wand"

"you are growing old, what do you expect, that the body will stay like this?....... it will get worse, it will give way, and it will be painful, and the pain will keep getting worse"

"I don't even know why you've come to me, the questions you ask are exasperating... how can you just listen to one doctors opinion and decide on no surgery....in India, people make a big deal of aneurysms, and even of age, I've operated on a patient who is 103, I don't know what you'll think"

And on and on and on......and in a tone and expression that was outright impatient and rude.

In retrospect, I feel if we buckled even an inch, he'd have had my father on the way to the operating table. 

He was actually provoking fear by repeatedly talking of the worst possible prognosis.

While what he said maybe the truth, the way he said it and the number of times he said it could take the courage and faith out of any living human being, leave alone an ailing and elderly patient.

Like my father later said 'he is not fit to be a doctor'. 

I shiver to imagine how many unsuspecting patients he has shaken up. Also why, when he says orthopedic surgeries are a life style choice, in the very same breath he also so vociferously talks definite deterioration and no other solution.

Dr Srikanth Gollamudi, you are in a caring profession. I wish you'd be able to look beyond your scalpel and your operating table, and actually see the patient and the person. You surely need that magic wand.... to work on yourself.

If I was already wary of the corporate hospitals, as I've had two close calls....two extreme experiences of incorrect diagnosis or treatment, this was like last nail in coffin (guess the subconscious mind does pick up appropriate metaphors)