Reading Seth on 'Making a new decision based on new information' really resonated with me, as it's a philosophy I hold dear to my heart. In my mind it reads thus:
I make a decision on Monday. The situation shifts on Tuesday. Be capable of changing the decision on Wednesday.
Truth is most people don't. In fact people even take pride in saying, 'once I've decided I don't change my mind', and that's a trait that's socially glorified and over hyped, and thus lends itself to many a situations staying status quo even when it's screaming out for change.
In fact I've seen this thrown at me when I wanted change, in personal as also work situations "but, you're the one who said this, you wanted it, it was your decision". ( true, but that was two years ago/ twenty years ago/ last week)
This is also why I don't subscribe to 'will power' as a tool 'to do'.....I'd much rather continue to 'want to do'. It's a way more potent driving force.
"Making a new decision based on new information. This is more difficult than it sounds.
To some people, it means admitting you were wrong.
(But of course, you weren't wrong. You made a decision based on one set of facts, but now you're aware of something new.)
To some people, sunk costs are a real emotional hot button, and walking away from investments of time, of money, and mostly, of commitment, is difficult.
(But of course, ignoring sunk costs is a key to smart decision making).
And, to some people, the peer pressure is enough to overwhelm your desire to make a better decision. 'What will I tell my friends?'
A useful riff you can try:
Sure, I decided that then, when I knew what I knew then. And if the facts were still the same, my decision would be too. But the facts have changed. We've all heard them. New facts mean it's time for me to make a new decision, without regard for what I was busy doing yesterday, without concern for the people who might disagree with me. This decision is more important than my pride."
You know, the statements seem to differ circumstantially. At work, we are often told to "let go". I watched a beautiful movie where in mountaineering, the son cuts the rope to "let go" of the father who has lost foothold and is dragging everyone else down and not able to forgive himself and the impact on his relationship with his sister (but then I digress). We talk about a strategy going wrong that needs to be packed off. And then I go after a deal with "not letting go" even with so many factors changing and at times, have won it since I refused to let go. There has to be a balance like every thing in life. Every decision needs to be made with some anticipation of the probable future changes (which is where the SWOT comes in). And then, it is the best decision. If conditions change, the decision is revisited. And that is standard practice in corporates "Don't fix what is not broken" and "Discard what is not working" but we seem to have a different view in personal life! Well.. I am rambling..
ReplyDeleteThat's a lot said...rambling or otherwise :)
ReplyDeleteAnd sure, I stand by the balance and swot too...a decision is about taking into consideration all pertinent factors in any given space...with awareness and discernment
Phew!!!
ReplyDeleteWow...Food for lots of Thoughts!! Especially a whole new perspective on the Will Power as a tool to do. I completely agree that if I want to do then I don't need to force myself to do. It comes naturally. Also I know that it's easier to make a new decision for me based on new information when I "want" to make the change and don't "need" to make the change. So will stay with my food of stirred thoughts.... Cheers!!
ReplyDeleteShweta, happy to see how much stirring's been done, and thanks for saying it so beautifully :)
ReplyDelete