Tumbbad

A film that I'd say reinvents horror in Indian Cinema.

A visually stunning film about folklore and metaphor and greed. Greed not just of man, but even God....demons not just out there, but as much within the mind.

Visually rich doesn't say enough of the brilliant cinematography, in terms of atmosphere, open landscapes juxtaposed with gripping claustrophobia. The incessant rain, which also the village is cursed with. create some stunning landscapes. Beautiful and eerie. Even to pick a picture to put in here, I got lost in looking as each is like a stunning painting.

A beautifully structured film, that gets told in three chapters between 1913 and 1947, with components of folklore, horror, drama and beauty.

It's a story set in Tumbbad, a cursed village that has created a temple to a god who was shunned for his greed. Ancestors of the god, continue to manifest the greed.  There's horror so yes, there are demons too. 

Rural Maharashtra of the pre-independence era......Brahmin patriarchy, the caste and gender oppression, the demons of greed....are all enmeshed into one weave of evil. It can't but haunt and overwhelm. 

It's rigorously and gloriously detailed, and I read later that it was seven years in the making, and you get why. And what's fascinating was to learn that Tumbbad really exists, close to Pune, and the film was shot in the Wada (fort) there. And what's more, the village does have a legend of a hidden treasure too.

I'm not going into storyline as it's yet in theatres, and I'd strongly recommend, especially the opportunity to catch it in large screen, so don't want to be a spoiler.

I'm not one to watch horror, but with Dhruva's strong recommendation, and willingness to come with me a second time,  I guess that one part of me caved. With reluctance I booked. And in the car when he said "amma, if there are scenes in the film you can't handle, don't get up and leave ok, just close your eyes and ears", I was all set for a real trip. 

It delivered that and way more. So so glad I went. 

Ungodly hours?!?

4 am.....yes, 4 in the morning

That hour today became our overlap time......Diksha hadn't slept yet, and I'd just gotten up.

We caught sunrise alongwith coffee, music and a movie. And the ungodly hour became oh so godly.

Some of our favourite songs, videos on youtube. Then came a song from Moana, and then one from Tangled, and then from Beauty and the Beast.

Beauty and the Beast is one of my favorites, and I'm telling her I could watch that any times over, and she's like "Up to watching now" ??

Well, why not was the thought... and we settled down in the kitchen and watched. 

And as with any great book or movie, each revisit throws up new stuff. This time I saw what I believe ought to have been the most obvious. The actual transformation of the beast. How had I even missed it?

Fairytales see. When you start with a fairytale frame, you already have this storyline 'good prince......wicked witch.....a spell .....the kiss of a beautiful princess....and they lived happily ever after"

Earlier times I'd seen how she falls in love with him as she sees layer by layer get revealed. She was the heroine.

It's only this time round that I saw layer by layer getting transformed ....and not just revealed. Suddenly he was the hero. Was fascinating.

To capture the mood: A song by Celine Dion and Peabo Bryson

Me Too

No newspaper, no TV.....yet what news needs to reach me, I believe, does.

The 'Me Too' movement is one such. The first I heard of it was a couple weeks back from Dhruva, when he asked " Did you hear of the Tanushree Dutta accusation of Nana Patekar amma? I've been following the US Me Too movement, and I'm so happy to see it picking up in India as well",  and that triggered a long discussion on it.

Apart from being glad that women are finally finding the space and the voice to speak out, I also felt good just listening to him be so vocally supportive.

Especially so, when what I'm hearing on the other end is so many men being critical... almost playing victim. To the extent of saying "I'd be scared to hire women in the work place", "I'm now scared to even talk friendly" "There are women who will misuse it".....and so on and so forth.

So sad.

That so many women have lived with it for so long is seemingly not visible to them. I know hardly anyone (my age group) who hasn't faced some form of sexual abuse or sexual harassment at some point in life. To think women have finally found the courage, the strength to overcome the stickiness and difficulties to talk about it........the issues it carries with it once out, and to not be even understood by their own male peer group.

Where is the fairness in this?

And this fear of misuse, which these men don't seem to be able to see beyond..... I can see two arguments against it. 

One; what it takes to come out is so sensitive and painful, that most women would cringe at the process, (look at what Chetan Bhagat's doing), and the courage it needs can come only from those who've suffered it. 

Two; no one's saying all women are paragons of virtue, they (we) are as human as the men. So even if there is a segment that does misuse, is that reason enough to let the rest of the female demographic suffer and suppress in silence?

What would it take for these men to know that all that's being asked of them is to understand 'consensual'. Or is that something that's not part of their lexicon...  part of a larger social issue of equality. 

Is what they are afraid of just simple 'fair and equal behavior' ??!!??

Wonder in your backyard

As metaphorical as real.....and as real as metaphorical

As incident, a couple days back I was just setting out for my morning walk, when Diksha and I got into a deep conversation. While my walk time went past, not wanting to interrupt the flow, I stayed put.

At 7.30, we're kind of done and she's like, "no, no, you should go....you've just about started walking after a two month break, so just go ma".

I went, and on impulse, instead of doing my usual route to KBR, I decided to walk the opposite way. I kept going into lanes and by-lanes I hadn't been in before. Allowed myself to get fully lost. And I was amazed to find that it was indeed an interesting and beautiful walk. Some lovely streets, beautiful houses, squirrels, old trees, and bonus was discovering two cute little parks.

In Pictures.

One of the parks I discovered. And I walked in to find just one lady walking, and then she comes up and says "aap lock karke chaavi wahan dena". Apparently a government park, but privately maintained. Nice.

Another angle of the same park.

A pretty lane

I love these bright yellow flowers

One of the streets

The BSNL tower plot from the opposite side...so old time it looks

Such pretty Bougenvillae

Another park, with a fancy name. It's called the hornbill park.

Another side of the park

Sure was an interesting walk. And what stayed with me was just that; 'the wonder in the backyard'.

Why did it take a negative stimulus like getting delayed for my walk, to even discover such pretty stuff ?

How much do we allow ourselves to be limited by our own patterns ...real time or in thought?

I'd read a quote recently: "Cages are made not only from rods, but from thoughts".  So fits !

Original Wisdom

'Original Wisdom - Stories Of An Ancient Way of Knowing' by Robert Wolff

A book that you feel, more than read.  

Robert Wolff, working in Kaula Lampur got to stay with and know several of the aborigines of Malay. To the extent that he got accepted by them enough to learn their ways of being (they believe in enabling learning rather than teaching).

He writes his experiences almost as they happened to him. A way of life when each person was so connected..... not just into others of the community, but into the naturalness of things.  Where they seem so part of nature that they can feel and communicate with trees and animals, and live as one with their environment. 

A world where extra sensory perceptions, energies, emotions and intentions underly life.... and how intuitions enable decisions and actions.

It's a life that seems to take as natural the concept of one consciousness. An instance in example: as practice, each morning the group sits together to discuss their dreams, puts together pieces of each others dream, and uses that as direction for the day.  According to them dreams are an alternate world, and more real than the physical one.  And Robert was able to bring this practice into his regular life, and piece together the message by imagining the group from the community. 

The naturalness is so pervasive that there is no structure or ownership, be it of property or people, no concept of family, finding ones own work by choice,  a natural way of healing and a space of joy and being.

Most aborigines in the world have been moved away from their habitat and legacy, and in that, to atleast get a glimpse of what it was.....  a book worth reading.

Swaroop, thanks for the book. 

Your sending it that day by speed post was more well timed than you know. It reached me the day I was leaving for Hawaii, and I even carried it with me. Had I read it then, I might have got to meet Robert Wolff, who has now settled in Hilo, Hawaii :)

Bryan Adams.....For Real

One concert.....so many experiences

His songs have been part of life ever since I can remember, through the growing up years ...past tense, into present continuous. There's songs of his even on my current CD in the car.

To see him in person, the ambience, the volume, the energy......it's pulsating.... a mind body experience.

Each of his numbers took me on a different trip. 

Heaven,  I do it for you, Have you ever loved a woman, Please forgive me, Summer of 69, Run to you, Straight from the heart, Cloud number 9, Can't stop this thing we started, When you love someone, You belong to me, I'll always be right there....

So many....and what I also enjoyed is knowing almost every song he played.

Another experience was going with Diksha. In that mad number of people, though most times we weren't even hanging around together, it just seemed to have attracted a lot of attention.  We had random folks coming up to say different stuff...was very sweet.  Like an occasion for both of us to re-cherish what we have.

Some pictures from the event:

Any pictures of Bryan Adams had to be only from the screen, that's how far we were from the stage :)

The audience

Playing 'I'd die for you '

A random bunch of us who just gravitated together and hung out for over an hour after the show

Another screen picture

Michael, who insisted on this picture :)

A groupie from one of the others we met

Well, a selfie to close

Late night at home, diksha sends me this message saying "that was so much fun ma, we should surely do this again". 

Amen to that.

Sukrutha & Sukrutha

While this might sound like Julia & Julia, it actually has a deeper connect. 

Sukrutha Mahendra, 80 yrs and Sukrutha Deshpande  22 yrs ...... the younger Sukrutha actually named after the first.

It's one more really uplifting Smile Foundation story, one that seemingly started way before even Smile Foundation did.

Let me tell the story.... in-between this Sukrutha and that Sukrutha, is Kavitha

Flash back around 40 years:  .Mom was working in Andhra Mahila Sabha, and Kavitha was daughter of mom's maid. Kavitha would occasionally help out her mother at our house.  I recall Kavitha, a skinny, but gutsy, fast and super efficient girl. The speed with which she spoke, or walked or swept would be noticed. In fact the speed with which she did the dishes would baffle us. She was a power.

She had dreams of joining the Police Force, as constable. We all felt she'd so fit the role. Sadly, circumstances at her home, (she was one of many daughters) the difficulties they came upon when her father got paralysed,  impacted her studies, and she couldn't clear her 10th class. She missed by one subject.  No encouragement from us could get her to try again. It broke her, and her dreams evaporated. 

She gave up, got married and became a full time maid. When she had her first daughter, she named her after my mom. 

That's the Sukrutha and Sukrutha.

Likely she'd shifted her dreams and aspirations to her daughter.  A strong independent woman is what she saw in my mom, I guess. 

Fast forward many years: Sukrutha was in school, Kavitha wanted her to go to a school that taught English, and that's where she connected back to us, to Smile Foundation.  Sukrutha would come all the way from Kachiguda to Srinagar Colony, changing three buses, along with her father to collect fees from Smile Foundation. We saw her grow from a gawky and shy school going girl to a young and confident college going student. We could see Kavitha's genes in her.

Fast Forward to now: Yesterday morning I get a message 

"Hi Di (short for didi), this is Sukrutha. I have good news. I got a job in ICICI". ( she went and met mom personally with the good news)

Sukrutha Deshpande, huge Congratulations, so so proud of you !!

Kavita: Kai bolu re......bahut bahuth badayee...deeper Congratulations to you....a dream that took a long time coming, but came true so beautifully. Very happy for you. Will come and give you a personal hug soon.

And Ma....so happy to have been on this journey with you. 

A rare and precious meet

Dad and Raju uncle, friends since 1957.........meeting, by chance (?) in Care Hospital.

Daddy and Raju uncle go back a long long way. They met when they joined service, when they were 23 and 27 years old, all of 61 years back, and have been friends ever since.

Through their growing up, work life, getting married, having children, grandchildren, .......... different cities, different offices, different experiences.......yet they kept in touch. They were so close. Raju uncle, aunty and their four sons, Madhu, Sudarshan, Murali and Vijay became our friends by default and they were always there, a peripheral, yet constant presence in life. 

While all of us lost touch, uncle and daddy stayed friends...all through, even post retirement. More recently, when age made mobility difficult they yet kept in touch over the phone.  Right until a few months ago, when  health conditions intervened even that.  

In fact just a couple months back I was telling daddy we should get a wheel chair and go see him, even I wanted to see uncle, wanted to hear his affectionate and gregarious voice again. But it didn't come to be.

Last week, daddy had an emergency, so serious that I don't trust myself to write and do justice to the depths it took us to. Suffice it to say, he came out yesterday to say "I feel like I am on a second lease of life".

Third day in hospital, mom walks in the door saying "guess who is also in the hospital...Raju uncle, I bumped into aunty in the lift". Chance ? Really ??.

Mom and I immediately went to see uncle . Next day Madhu and Vijay came up to see daddy.

Fourth day came news that uncle was being discharged after a month in the hospital, and daddy was ready to go see him. That was the first laughter I heard in his voice after a long time, when he said "how does my tie look?" (he had to go down in the hospital gown). We needed special permission and he was wheelchaired to uncle's room.

Precious moments .....to see them together again. And to hear daddy say to him "all things have to come to an end Raju.....and we are both on the fringe........"