Immersion '2017

This is a really personal journey. I'm surprisingly finding that, not withstanding extensive diary writing, putting it out here forces yet another perspective.

How?

I get to see it as a finished product.

A diary is all about process. It questions, it meanders, it sorts, it feels, it cries, it holds............here you get to the end. The smile....the pat on the back comes from here.

People have asked me why anybody else would be interested in reading about my life. Valid question?

I don't know. I only know I'm digging deeper and deeper, and sometimes it throws up stuff that can provide perspective. In fact that's what anything does. Whether it's watching a movie, or reading a book, or talking to friends, or reading an interview. Why are reality shows so popular. Why would anybody watch 'big boss'? I've known many who do, in fact even people who get up in the night to watch them sleep. What makes that happen?

The essence is when something out there resonates with the you, when you can make that connection. And use that, in turn, to make a connection into yourself. Get that fresh perspective. Grow with the perspective. It's always about us. Watching or Reading or Writing or What have you.....

The other day Diksha was telling me that there are personal diaries for sale on the net.

I was totally taken aback. I'm like "why would anybody be interested in buying someone else's diary deech?" And she's like, "well, guess it can be interesting ma, how often do you really get to see into another person's mind". (My thought - 'how often do we even look into our own minds?')

That's when the stark difference between process and product hit me. How many of us can claim to know ourselves? be ourselves? emotions, thoughts, feelings....to the extent of being secure enough to be able to 'own' it. 

Not saying I can,  I have my own thresholds, but pushing that boundary is an ongoing process. 

"For most people, the level of self-awareness is quite modest, and we all tend to operate on surface-level emotions and behaviors, adding our own interpretation through a set of complex, sub-conscious perceptual and egoic filters".

Process. The Path.....It's about getting on it.

Unbelievable, but a second try at getting to actual recap, and side tracked again :)