Values - Understanding Your Own

Let's take a 'What', 'Why' and 'How' approach to this topic.

What are Values?

Values are personal beliefs, principles or ideas that are important to you in your life. Values are what you believe in....... and are willing to support and stand up for.

They (should) determine your priorities, and, deep down, they're probably the measures you use to tell if your life is being lived the way you want it to.

Values exist....Values exist at an individual level, whether or not you recognize them.

Why it helps to Know your Values?

Values act as our compass to keep us in the direction we want to be moving in. When the things that you do and the way you behave match your values, you're likely to be satisfied and content. But when these don't align with your personal values, that's when things 'feel'.... wrong and this can be a source of disquiet or unhappiness.

Recognizing them, articulating them, knowing them....helps your decision making stay in alignment with your values.  

And this makes sense because many facets in life exist on a continuum. There are some discrete entities like being married or not married....... but your work, avocation, health, financial status, relationship intimacy, and level of happiness are generally continuous, meaning that they can gradually get better or worse.

More specifically, there's two reasons why identifying and prioritizing our own values becomes important. One, that time is finite, and it surely fits to optimize on the time we have. Second, we as human beings tend to be fairly inconsistent in how we invest our time and energy and also tend to get easily distracted by different priorities each day.

There's also times you'll find values within yourself clash. And that's when you need to know which one is more important to you. It's the core of how we want to define or live our life. A choice of value, especially against a clashing value means we are accepting the consequence that comes with the decision. In fact this enables us to accept the ensuing difficulty with that much more ease.

So, take the time to understand the real priorities in your life, and you'll be able to determine the best direction and space for yourself.

How to Identify and Prioritize your top values?

This step is probably the most difficult, because it'll mean an honest look within. But then, it's also the most important, because, when making a decision, you'll have to choose between solutions that may satisfy different values. This is when you must know which value is more important to you.

Feelings are a gauge meter. When things are going well, you're fine. But when there's a disquiet or discomfort, you need to let it talk. Need to stay with the feeling, step back, slow down. A normal pattern is to shut it down, cover it up and move on. That works short term....but for long term...it's best to listen.

By prioritizing your values consciously, you'll be able to rely on them when you need to make the so many decisions that we make as we go along, the big ones and the little ones.

Here's an indicative list of values you could prioritize. Each of us will know which of these matters to us, and how much... and feel free to add your own: 

1	Recognition	To be acknowledged
2	Duty	To dedicate myself to what I call responsibility
3	Expertness	To gain expertise in a skill/be an authority
4	Independence	To have freedom of thought and content
5	Joy	To enjoy life
6	Power	To have authority and control over others
7	Leadership	To become influential and to lead others
8	Affection	To obtain and share companionship
9	Parenthood	To have heirs and raise a fine family
10	Acceptance	To be received with approval
11	Expressiveness	To have an open mind and be expressive
12	Wealth	To earn or have a great deal of money
13	Health	To ensure fitness and physical well being
14	Compassion	To contribute to the well being of others
15	Self Realization	To optimize personal development
16	Security	To have a secure and stable position
17	Prestige	To become well known and to have status
18	Career	To attain work goals
19	Intimacy	To be close to others
20	Stability	To have the ability or strength to withstand change

It's an incredibly useful concept in understanding oneself, and well worth the time and energy spent on it.

In terms of outcome, I'd say it's a tool that enables 'feelings, thoughts and actions aligned' which imho, is heaven :)