Let's do a feel check.
The feeling wheel up there, I know it's crazy detailed, but just as an indicative spread......it gives an idea of how deep we can go in labeling, and thereby understanding and thus regulating our own emotions......... and to that extent enable better decision making and piloting of our own lives.
If asked how you're feeling, your answer will likely range between 'good, okay, great, fine, not too good, kind of okay' and the like.
On the other hand if asked, what are the emotions you felt today ( or maybe over last week), your list would likely slightly expand, maybe ranging from two to five.
Research has shown with growing evidence that it is difficult to properly identify and label the myriad of emotions we experience on a regular basis. To draw an analogy, we are constantly taking black and white photographs of the very colorful scenes of our lives.
Feelings are not rational. They just are. And dark negative emotions can quickly flee when exposed to the light. It's about knowing. (Sure we could also distract or suppress and wait for them to tide over. Tide over they will, for now, but they do not go away. They still sit somewhere within your system, just biding their time to surface, in whatever other form)
Labeling emotions isn't necessary for their primary—and immediate—purpose. 'The conscious understanding of emotions is superfluous from a survival standpoint,' says Gillihan a research psychologist. 'If I'm running away from a tiger in caveman days, I never say to myself, 'I am afraid.' I just think, Tiger! I've got to get out of here! I handle the threat and survive.' In modern times, however, our feelings often arise from our relationships, careers, travel, and such, and we benefit from a more considered response. "It helps to be able to put a frame around more complex emotions."
And while emotions sometimes do combine smoothly into an easily comprehensible new experience, the way a tiny dab of white paint can turn a dollop of red paint a vibrant pink, at other times they clash and confuse, leaving us unsure how to respond.
To turn to an example, if my coworker messed something up and I'm only aware of the anger his mistake makes me feel, I might think that I'm justified in lashing out at him. But if I happen to be aware that my emotional response also includes anxiety about having to fix this issue, I might be more motivated to down regulate my anger so that I can recruit his help. In this second scenario, our relationship remains strong, and we effectively work together to solve problems. Thus, making an effort to understand our emotions in nonjudgmental ways can be quite valuable in terms of helping us regulate them better, and consequently, navigate our environments more smoothly.
Importantly, some people experience greater difficulties labeling their emotions than others. No matter how complex their emotions might be, they still come up with only a few labels to describe them. This impoverished emotional labeling is, in turn, associated with deficits regulating those emotions (see Vine & Aldao, 2014). In other words, the less aware we are of our emotions, the less likely we are to figure out how to best regulate them.
Importantly, some people experience greater difficulties labeling their emotions than others. No matter how complex their emotions might be, they still come up with only a few labels to describe them. This impoverished emotional labeling is, in turn, associated with deficits regulating those emotions (see Vine & Aldao, 2014). In other words, the less aware we are of our emotions, the less likely we are to figure out how to best regulate them.
The feeling wheel up there, I know it's crazy detailed, but just as an indicative spread......it gives an idea of how deep we can go in labeling, and thereby understanding and thus regulating our own emotions......... and to that extent enable better decision making and piloting of our own lives.
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