The Two Vocabularies

From Seth

The two vocabularies (because there are two audiences)

"Early adopters want to buy a different experience than people who identify as the mass market do.

Innovators want something fresh, exciting, new and interesting.

The mass market doesn't. They want something that works.

It's worth noting here that you're only an early adopter sometimes, when you want to be. And you're only in the mass market by choice as well. It's an attitude.

The people bringing new ideas to the public are early adopters themselves (because it's often more thrilling than working in a field that does what it did yesterday), and often default to using words that appeal to people like themselves, as opposed to the group in question.

More rarely, there are a few people with a mass market mindset that are charged with launching something for the early adopters, and they make the opposite mistake, dressing up their innovation as something that's supposed to feel safe.

When you bring a product or service or innovation to people who like to go first, consider words/images like: 

New 

Innovative 

Pioneer 

First 

Now 

Limited 

Breakthrough 

Controversial 

Technology 

Brave 

Few 

Hot 

Untested 

Slice/Dominate/Win 

Private 

Dangerous 

Change 

Secret 

On the other hand, people who aren't seeking disruption are more likely to respond to: 

Tested 

Established 

Proven 

Industry-leading 

Secure 

Widespread 

Accepted 

Easy 

Discounted 

Everyone 

Experienced 

Certified 

Highest-rated 

Efficient 

Simple 

Guaranteed 

Accredited 

Public 

Of course, it's important that these words be true, that your product, your service and its place in the world match the story you're telling about it.

Once you see this distinction, it seems so obvious, yet our desire to speak to everyone gets in the way of our words."

This I think this is true not just in the context of how you package or sell your product, but also in daily life. When communicating, especially in sensitive or difficult conversations, it helps to tune into the other's receptivity, and words...language is one way of tuning in.

The Drive Itself

4th March - The drive from Bangalore to Hyderabad

Considering it was just Diksha and me, we wanted to start early, but this was one time we couldn't. We had to do the house handover in the morning, and by the time we set off it was noon.

Diksha's last hug to Goldy and Skippy

This was senti (pun intended) bye to the garden ...I find the fragrance of ganeru intoxicating ( and I'd taken that plant as a little sapling when I'd moved from hyd, so more special significance)

And we were off

The road between Blore and Hyd is a dream stretch, beautiful, not crowded, mixed terrain, some ghats included.... very enjoyable indeed. When the packers in Hyd asked how the car had come, and I told them, they said in raw amazement "bachee ne saara 600 kms drive kiya? "

Such empty stretches, that it wasn't for a long while that I even realized that Diksha was doing between 130 and 140 kph

A pretty town on the way

A tough sight.....Diksha was at first like.."why would you want a picture of an overturned lorry ma, it's insensitive". And I was trying to tell her there's no good or bad to it, it's a happening......and then she's like.....ok " maybe it's a PS; Drive Safe"

I have to add...we did brilliant music all the way..... a whopping 83 songs . These particular CDs are now like our long drive anthem, and adds the right touch. This time even more literally....when we started it, it started with the line 'something's telling me.... I must go home' It was an uncanny moment.

On this really dry stretch, there was this lone shepherd....a really old man gesticulating with an empty water bottle, and Diksha actually pulled over ( at that speed it took her that distance to even pull over) and that's her, walked back to give him water (she gave off the bottle)

Our lunch halt. This Blue Moon guy had boards starting about forty kms before location and it sure built up the expectation. He delivered too. We had lovely tandoor roti, andaa burji, and dal fry, washed down with buttermilk. 

Sunset on the way ( as I was advised to cover as much distance as possible before dark, our coffee stop was post dusk)

Diksha and Bruce ( that's what the figo's called)...........thanks for that lovely drive 'back home'.

Our Home For The Last Three Years

A tribute to a house I'd grown to love so much....Aster, Rajaprakruthi. And a memory of the experience being tucked away for posterity.

To go back three years.....right from the effort of searching for a house. It had been a focused effort at finding that one place, where the moment you walk in you just know...this is it. I'd seen atleast fifteen houses before I found this.

At that point I hadn't realized how deep that 'This is it' was going to get.

That's Aster from the pool side

This is dawn from my favorite seat on my couch.

Diksha with cat, who adopted us almost soon as we moved in. She came in as a squiggly little kitten, who seemed so traumatized, that initially he would hiss at us even when we went to feed her. It was a slow trust building process....and over the years went on to her bringing in her kittens for us to look after.

Just a perspective I wanted

When skittles (group name for the kittens) were little (for scale, see same shelf above) there's three of them there....that's how little they were

A favorite flower...it's called violet flower (it in fact also comes in white and is still called violet flower. I firmly believe I willed this into the garden. I could see it on the street behind but couldn't find it any nursery around, and over a few months, to my utter amazement, I saw it had found it's way into our garden

Diksha hula hooping in the drawing room

A forever moment....I come home from class and find this b'day gift from Diksha in my room.... plants and a scented candle, she sure knows me

That's Jayamma, who in addition to the work she did so well, worked so hard at teaching me kannada..and over the three years did a fairly good job. I can get by decently well now.

Saroja, always soft and gentle ....who cooked the yummiest food for us. Got her to make chicken biryani on the last day, and it was mind blowing, and what's best.... simple in recipe too, so like Saroja

And Rangappa, with the quintessential green fingers, and that ready smile. When I said my bye, he was like..."Once in a while I might call you, it's okay no". Well.....just added to my touching farewells.

Loki and Pradeep, my local kirana store

Diksha in a playful moment in the garden ( before the kittens made it less green :)

When some plants were getting ready to move with us...look at that look in his eyes,,,,skippy just knew we were leaving. The sixth sense is so real. He in fact scratched diksha...something he'd never done before.

I write so much about the house, not just because it was beautiful, and has so many lovely memories........but also because it was deeply meaningful time spent there. No exaggeration.....each day I turned the key in the door was a moment of gratitude and joy.

Saroja and Jayamma had this to say:

"amma....nanu althaidini, neevu nagtha hothidira...namana bitu hogthidira..eliduru chanageiri, namanna nenisukoli"

(we are crying at your leaving, and you're laughing ..... wherever you are, be well and think of us). They wouldn't believe it wasn't easy for me too......

Now to start afresh.....yet another phase of life

Woman's Day

It's inevitable that the day bring up some intense discussion ....it's after all still a high opinion, high conditioned, high emotion space.

There are lots of forwards and quotes and sayings doing the rounds. And the discussion with a friend this morning was how, many of those videos, while apparently women oriented, are yet a weak effort...in fact yet quite regressive in fact. For instance, she'd seen a video of the woman asking for recognition for the role of running the house. 

That's really not shift enough. When the accepted norm today is that both work, why is it that running the home is still the woman's responsibility, why is it that she needs to ask for help, or even feels gratitude when the man of the house helps.

It should ideally be shared responsibility. 

Sure it's far far off from there....but it's fair to want it atleast as aspirational space :)

While I'm at it, here's a super cute advertisement....it's never too late to claim your life

Shift From B'lore to Hyd

It's an event that I just have to chronicle in detail....like capturing a process

It's been five days of continuous action. 

3rd March - Packing in Bangalore

4th March - Driving down To Hyd

5th March - Waiting for the truck (as the driver overslept),  and unloading till midnight

6th March - Opening of cartons, all 82 of them

7th March - Setting up a new home ( which is still on)

It's hard to capture how this touches us.......it's all our own stuff, but everything has moved. A new place, a new position, a new look. And in that sense it almost takes on a surreal feel.

Even literally.... it's a time you get to look at every little piece of stuff in your house, a time to junk the junk...... keep what you want, either for sentimental reasons or for practical reasons, still stuff that you want. And in the process a lot of decluttering automatically happens.

In terms of feelings, there's at one time a lot of mixed emotions....fear, discomfort, stress, fatigue....in fact the anticipation and exciting I need to search for. It'll have to wait it's turn I guess......it's kind of overwhelming space.

To know, and do what you want.....not easy. Reminds me of the Mandela quote.

"Courage is not the absence of fear, but the triumph over it. The brave man is not he who does not feel afraid, but he who conquers that fear". Still in process, and that's when the quote comes in handy :)

Packing up at Bangalore

Shaaraam, Girija and Diksha, caught in a candid moment :)

Some sort of checklist happening at the loading..me, diksha and shaaraam

Girija actually in the lorry to check on something. They were all pretty taken aback when she actually go on ...so was I in fact

The truck itself 

              

               
Girija and Shaaraam, thanks a ton for having been there through the day....to help through the packing and running around.....and to hold when the tears came. Goodbyes don't come easy.

Musings - Tuning The Antennae

Like I said, it's moving time.

Our countdown has begun...and I've been observing a shift in the manner of 'being'. While at one end there's tons of To Do's, pushing the list on daily basis, and life has gotten into first gear mode............ on the other hand, the being in the present has also dug in deeper....more present, more joyous and more connected. 

It's almost like more awake....literally and metaphorically. Needing less than five hours sleep......plus more alive in the moment.

From even where I sit now, I hear more birds, the flowers seem more pink, the air smells more grassy, the room seems cosier,  the shelves, the almirahs, the books......everything feels more real.... the kittens playing look more full of life.......and I'm almost left wondering how.

It's such an aware and present space, it's beautiful...like being high on weed without the weed :)

Some core level of being touched, whereby the antennae have gotten sharper.....a deeper sense of mindfulness

Such a paradox that moving can create more stillness.

A Moving Moment.... (Pun Intended)

Times come for yet another major shift in life......a move back to Hyderabad.

It's a conscious choice, and it brings with it lots of anticipation and excitement, but there's also the heaviness and sadness of leaving behind all that's become dear to us. 

And that's a space we're dealing with......the poignancy of the feelings, letting go of attachments..... getting so much last minute stuff done, and there's all the planning and closing down happening........ and I get a series of these notes. Started with one yesterday, one this morning....and another one this evening....... and if I thought the first one was touching, by the third I was overwhelmed. The tears were just waiting I guess. It's just that when they came, they came as happy sad tears.

There was so much effort ...and thought..... and love in those notes, it was amazing to see how beautifully they communicated what they felt.

Each note has chocolates taped behind, a cadbury, toblerone and five star. Then the pretty flowers attached. And I could see that they'd first written it out in pencil and then over written with a sketch pen. And then made sure each of them used a different color sketch pen. 

It touched so deep, that they became notes and moments that are being put away for life. The forever moments that makes life that much more special.

And I leave happy knowing the kittens are in good hands. In fact Sahana was initially so scared, she'd watch from inside the house, and then gradually sit with me on the steps, and is now totally comfortable even touching the kittens. Janya is the one who ensures that there's enough kitten time in the time that they get to play. Gowri was so thrilled to have the kittens, and more to have her mum say 'yes she could feed them in the garden', a huge accomplishment for her, she pretty much lit up.

It's a bond for life, for them with kittens....and in some subtle way, with kiki aunty too :)

Realized this story is not complete without a picture of the skittles (as they were jointly called by Diksha)

Gowri, Janya and Sahana.......It's been an absolute joy knowing you, and I can't begin to tell you how much your notes mean to me. They have filled my leaving with sweetness and love. Thanks sweeties !!