A Books Coup

This is a seemingly crazy, eccentric project that my cousin Swaroop is on......the extent people with a passion will go to.

So there's this couple, a brother and sister pair, (both of who never got married), and the brother passed away recently. The sister, who is now 92, decided to sell their collection of books, 6000 books, for a lumpsum amount of 2.5 lakh. And yes, Swaroop bought it. In fact the first time he went to Chennai (from Bangalore) to take them, she started crying saying she's not ready to part with them, and he very generously, and kindly I think, agreed to make another trip. 

The brother Shri Ramaswami was editor of Hindu and the sister was a professor of literature or history, just to give you a range of the interests the books cover. There's everything....cricket, philosophy, history, fiction, national geographics from the 20's, and lots of other stuff. Like Razors edge and Gone with the wind, 1940s prints.

The fact that Ramaswami was a cricket buff was I think , the deciding factor for Swaroop to pick up the collection. (he otherwise will not spend money easily....and that's understating it)

I went to his house yesterday and it looks like this:

There are 81 cartons  !!

He's now into the painstaking but super pleasurable job (if this is sounding near orgasmic..it's meant to ;), of going through the lot...... cataloging them, filling up all possible shelves in the house, buying more book shelves......he says it feels like digging for treasure........and after keeping what he wants, he's going to look for buyers who really care. 

These are all the books on cricket that have already found place in his bedroom shelf. He's got some real precious ones there...I think he mentioned one by Don Bradman, and he's got the entire Wisden collection, right from 1920s ( for those like me, who don't know, this is apparently the Bible of Cricket ).

This was the coup I think, a signed copy by Ranji. ( yes, the one after who the Ranji Trophy is named).

If it wasn't for my recent asthma thingy, I would have taken off work to be part of this project :(

Anyone who might be interested, or know anyone who might be interested, do let me know. He eventually needs buyers, as right now, there's no place for anything else in his house :)

Freedom

Well, what better day to talk of Freedom than Independence Day, right?

And then to quote Gandhiji too......but that's just by chance. The freedom I'm quoting Gandhi for is really not, with all due respect, about India gaining freedom from British rule, or Non violence or Dandi March or any of that. It's about the freedom he exemplified in his life.  

A defining moment happened to me when I visited Sabarmati Ashram about four years ago. Not sure what about the place did it......if it's the energy of the place, or the aura, or the atmosphere...but it was a surreal experience. I remember telling Dhruva, who was also with me, that something was happening and could he feel it......because I could so distinctly feel it.....whatever that 'it' is.... It was an intense experience.

And I think it gets best exemplified in 'Be the change you want to see in the world'. 

It's about how he exemplified freedom. His own story, of how he evolved as an individual, his ability to talk of his mistakes, his learnings, and how he changed and grew as an individual. A giant of man in personifying living by ones principles. And how that enabled him to attract the energy and consciousness by which he could change the destiny of a whole nation. 

Can we look for this freedom within. Can we grow beyond 'control', live by our own choices, our own principles.

Growth is a continuing process......... and there's no growth without the freedom to take those chances, to make those mistakes, and then to learn from them. It goes on.......

Notes, not received

Another one from Seth

An expected apology rarely makes things better. But an expected apology that never arrives can make things worse.

An expected thank you note rarely satifies. But an expected thank you that never arrives can make things worse.

On the other hand, the unexpected praise or apology, the one that comes out of the blue, can change everything.

It's easier than ever to reach out and speak up. Sad, then, how rarely we do it when it's not expected.

A Hyderabad That Was

Got these on Whats App today.....

Thanks Ravi, for forwarding these inspite of my rigid 'no forwards' stand :)

A 'Let's Dance' Moment

This is a moment which marked a dream come true to Girija, and I must give kudos there. Take a bow pal.

                                                        That's Girija on stage

And why it becomes a big moment; It's because I've heard her talk of wanting to dance for over fifteen years now, maybe even more. This goes way back to when we were both with IDBI.  Once we even surreptitiously decided we'll go learn dance. (why surreptitiously is a long story which we won't delve into here). She did all the spade work, the finding out...... we went to the dance school, and after all that she never joined, and I ended up doing two years of Salsa :)

Then years later she decided she'd do Tai Chi which is a Japanese dance form, with super slow dance movements, and she did a lot of work on that too, but for whatever reason even that didn't happen.

Then five years back she spoke of  joining uday shankars dance school, and again that wasn't to be.

She'd talk of how she thought she must have been a court dancer in her previous birth and stuff....and then you know the yearning runs deep.

So, coming from there, to actually see her on stage today, as part of a contemporary dance.... well, it felt so so so good. She showed me the bruises from the practice..... with so much pride, like they were life's little pleasures. 

And what's more, she even spoke on behalf of the dance school and I'm sure that must be inspiration to others who might be sitting back with, it's too late to dance, especially to learn. 

Some more pictures from the evening:

 Kala Soudha, a nice cosy auditorium with an old world feel.

 Kartik Tantra, the dance teacher. Another inspiration for others. He's a software guy, but who runs this dance school called Abstractics ( abstract ideas put to tactical perfection through dance).

 This was a nice contemporary and classical dance fusion

Another group dance

Girija again

And know what she said after the event, when I asked her how it felt? She says, 'it's where I belong, there on that stage...... it's not the audience, it's the stage, like it was always meant to be'. Well, glad once more. 

Proud of you my dear friend.......Encore ! Encore !

How to Love

“Nothing is mysterious, no human relation. Except love.” Susan Santog

Doubt anybody would debate that one. You can still parse, decipher, identify, slot and understand all other emotions, but when it comes to the most elemental of emotions, there seems to be that one part which is just beyond.... that defies rationalization.

Sure, there's folks who'll define, believe, don't believe, explain... in terms of fondness, affection, freedom, trust, attraction, lust, vibes.....and I guess it would be all of that, plus more. It's not for nothing that 'what is love' is a most searched for phrase on Google :) (zeitgeist data)

So let's not go to the What of it....will bow to acceptance there.  Let's embrace the mystery. 

Let's instead look at the How of it, and that's where I really liked what Thich Nhat Hanh says when he talks of 'How to Love' in terms of mastering the art on InterBeing:

“To love without knowing how to love wounds the person we love.” Thich Nhat Hanh

                                               

To receive his teachings one must make an active commitment not to succumb to the modern pathology of cynicism... our flawed self-protection mechanism that readily dismisses anything sincere and true as simplistic or naïve, even if, or precisely because, we know that all real truth and sincerity are simple by virtue of being true and sincere.

Nhat Hanh says, the question becomes how to grow our own hearts, which begins with a commitment to understand and bear witness to our own suffering:(suffering here not in the typical dramatic sense, but in the Buddhist sense of life's ordeals or livings)

When we feed and support our own happiness, 

we are nourishing our ability to love. 

That’s why to love means to learn 

the art of nourishing our happiness.

He points out the crucial difference between infatuation, which replaces any real understanding of the other with a fantasy of who he or she can be for us, and true love:

Often, we get crushes on others not because we truly love and understand them, but to distract ourselves from our suffering. When we learn to love and understand ourselves and have true compassion for ourselves, then we can truly love and understand another person.

Real, truthful love, he argues, is rooted in four elements — loving kindness, compassion, joy, and equanimity — fostering which lends love “the element of holiness.” 

The essence of loving kindness is being able to offer happiness. You can be the sunshine for another person. You can’t offer happiness until you have it for yourself. So build a home inside by accepting yourself and learning to love and heal yourself. Learn how to practice mindfulness in such a way that you can create moments of happiness and joy for your own nourishment. Then you have something to offer the other person.

If you have enough understanding and love, then every moment — whether it’s spent making breakfast, driving the car, watering the garden, or doing anything else in your day — can be a moment of joy.

This interrelatedness of self and other is manifested in the fourth element as well, equanimity, the Sanskrit word for which — upeksha — is also translated as “inclusiveness” and “nondiscrimination”:

In a deep relationship, there’s no longer a boundary between you and the other person. You are her and she is you. Your suffering is her suffering.  Suffering and happiness are no longer individual matters. What happens to your loved one happens to you. What happens to you happens to your loved one. You can no longer say, “That’s your problem.”

Supplementing the four core elements are also the subsidiary elements of trust and respect, the currency of love’s deep mutuality:

When you love someone, you have to have trust and confidence. Love without trust is not yet love. Of course, first you have to have trust, respect, and confidence in yourself. Trust that you have a good and compassionate nature. You are part of the universe; you are made of stars. When you look at your loved one, you see that he is also made of stars and carries eternity inside. Looking in this way, we naturally feel reverence. True love cannot be without trust and respect for oneself and for the other person.

To love without knowing how to love wounds the person we love. To know how to love someone, we have to understand them. To understand, we need to listen.

The more you understand, the more you love; the more you love, the more you understand. They are two sides of one reality. The mind of love and the mind of understanding are the same.

What I heard yet again: Mindfulness. Mindfulness to enable Deep Listening........ Listening to the self and Listening to the other 

An Year Into Blogging

I did a lot of, should I......should I not.......on this post.

And then realized, that this, above all else, has been such a unique experience, that if I didn't, I'd be, so to say, circumventing the pivot.

                            

                                                 Just the nostalgia of the fountain pen ....sigh!!

This last month I've already done two 'An Years',  'An Year in Bangalore' and 'An Year with SELCO', and they've both meant so much in terms of change, risk, fun, learning and such. Good stuff...but in the realm of normal.......great normal, but normal, like.... you know.

But writing.....I think that takes experience to a whole new level. Like if I actually had to stack rank, it would be way up there.  I'm talking here of writing as an expression....be it diary, scribbling, blog, letters and stuff.

If I can talk just of the enormity of impact that writing has enabled, it would be a tribute. So here goes.....

So, what's the big deal, right? You have thoughts, and you put them down, and fiddle around some and voila......it's done

Well, won't deny many write ups are like that, but the one's that are not?

There you'd be amazed. It just doesn't work like that. When you start to put pen to paper ( metaphors come from conditioned space), within a few minutes you'll start to realize you are actually saying different and new things, some nice, wonderful and clear.....some crazy confusing. What's worse they're at times not even consistent, and worst worst....at times actually even contradictory. It's crazy how you end up having to actually start and restart, think through from the beginning......from the middle, from the side.....from different perspectives, and how you'll find yourself reach spaces you've only barely touched, unfamiliar areas, mixed thoughts....

It gradually shifts you from living life in a nebulous, default zone to one that's more conscious, more aware.....you know the why of things.....and what's best, you live in a zone that has the why answered. It doesn't just change the way you think...it changes the way you live, the way you are.

Think of it this way......We all have an inner voice that speaks non stop, all kinds of thoughts, it's almost always on. Lets say this inner voice is like a friend. And with writing, this inner voice becomes this really intelligent and wise and interesting friend. Can you imagine the amount of growth and learning impact when you spend so much time with that level of intelligence? All of us have that potential, we just need to tap in :)

And that's the magic space.....where there's clear conversation within.

Today researchers are studying whether the power of writing — and then rewriting — your personal story can lead to behavioral changes and improve happiness.  

Researchers believe that by writing and then editing our own stories, we can change our perceptions of ourselves and identify obstacles that stand in the way of better life and even health, that it can improve mood disorders, help reduce symptoms among cancer patients, improve a person’s health after a heart attack, reduce doctor visits and  boost memory.

It may sound like self-help nonsense, but research suggests the effects are real.

I fully Agree

It's enabled an inner journey......an awakening so to say, on par with, maybe even more than, Vipassana, or Pranic Healing. A complete shift in energy and knowing consciousness that actually steers life.

It is a level of clarity and awareness, and I guess outlook and attitude that kind of puts you in one sort of invincible space. (retaining bragging rights here). I sometimes could get jealous of myself.....funnily...like thinking, oh my god, this is so good...don't ever forget to be grateful. Oh my god, how does something so brilliant keep getting better? And know what? It actually does :)

So in essence, a real pivot. 

I'd say it's a brilliant tool to get to a space of Thoughts, Feelings and Actions Aligned. My definition of Honesty and Heaven.