Some Ahas' and Learnings Reiterated

Learnings captured....Learnings imbibed; two separate things :)

I recently heard a psychoanalyst tell how "we all often come across potentially life changing moments. It's our radars that need to be tuned enough to capture the Ahas in them. And then, does capturing them at a conscious level suffice? "  Well, quite apparently not 

Why? Why is it that even when an aha resonates, we yet have a problem imbibing it?

Because our subconscious drivers and motivators are way more powerful. Those are the ones which are already well imbibed, likely from childhood. There's ones that we identify with and own, and there's also ones we own but that don't serve us, what are called self defeating beliefs ....and they can become obstacles to growth. 

They are the ones we need to let go off and replace with the ahas which we like, the learnings which appeal.....and that's the growth process, we could be on our way to living and being what we aspire to.

Needs that much more effort and awareness

Some of mine which have been either strengthened or reiterated over the year:

1. Clarity enables good decision making:

I can't emphasize this enough. Clarity is about knowing the 'why' and 'what' of anything from it's depths, from it's layers and nuances. It's more about yourself, and what makes you tick. Once there, you'll recognize it, because it's the space you know you know.

Clarity can enable you to be you. To be the you beyond role and societal expectation. It's what enables the seemingly unusual and difficult decisions.

Once you've sharpened clarity, you don't even need courage to take those difficult decisions ( you can use all the courage for the implementation thereof :)

2. Make a difference: 

Do this beyond role and relationship. When you bring yourself a hundred percent to any interaction, there is a qualitative difference.  It's about going beyond the role, being there fully in that situation.

It can happen with shopkeepers, cabdrivers, children on the street.....in whichever interaction it might be.... be it with family, friends, acquaintances, dogs, cats, cows...........if  you believe your opinion or action can add value,  care enough to put it out there. 

It takes so much energy, that if we can do it even to the extent we can, we're in good space...and we'll yet make that difference. 

3. With more freedom comes more responsibility: 

In fact more freedom means more responsibility. Freedom is about choice.... It gives you the space to choose. There's no default, no framework, no role, no rule. Once you make your own choices, every moment thereafter is one of responsibility to live those choices. 

4. Make Gratitude second nature:

When you feel gratitude, grateful you are already in good space, it means you have something to be grateful for. And when you feel good about yourself, you are quite naturally good to others. Nice to be good no.

5. Find yourself:

This is no static process.

Find those spaces within, and with others where you can be on that path of  discovering 'you'.... to become comfortable with 'becoming'....and in that process meet yourself behind your mask... vulnerable, in process, flaws included,whatever. Invest in becoming a fuller you. There's a deeper fulfillment there.

A couple of quotes that say it so well:

Socrates - "the unexamined life is not worth living"
Virginia Wolff  “a self that goes on changing is a self that goes on living.”

6. Get past your own Assumptions and Presumptions : 

Become aware of how many of our thoughts have no real basis. So many of them which we think are facts, are really only assumptions. 

Assumptions are second nature to us, arising out of our own and societal conditioning. There's so much of ourselves and our responses to life which come out of these assumptions.

Worth making the question into habit...... Is this fact or is this assumption?

Like Buddha said "know the why" of anything and everything.

7. Own your Emotions: 

What makes us, more than our thoughts, is our emotions, our feelings.

What would it take to recognize and own our emotions.... not just the good ones, but even the difficult ones. There is enough research today to show that you cannot selectively numb dark emotions. By numbing vulnerability and fear, you by default numb joy and excitement.

Feel them all, they are your pathway to a life that's enhanced and magnified.

8. Emotional Expressiveness: 

Next step to owning those emotions, find those spaces in life where you can express them. Don't just talk thoughts, talk feelings. Talk vulnerable spaces. It's where you'll find the true stories, where you'll make meaning.

A litmus test is, if you're scared to talk of it, you are being vulnerable. It's what enables you to dig in deeper, know yourself that notch better.....and there's joy and fulfillment there.

Carl Jung - "The least of things with a meaning is worth more in life than the greatest of things without it."

9. Find those spaces of flow: 

What are those spaces which lets you loose yourself. Where you are so engrossed that you loose sense of time. You are done, and you come out feeling so good, so 'put together'.

Find those spaces ....... be it an activity, a book, a relationship, a game, a place, a project......just about anything that can get you there. It is one of those most fulfilling of feelings, the feelings that add stories and meaning to life.

10. Let's get Generous : 

No, I'm not talking just money, though that could be a nice starting point. Trust me, we each have a lot more in us which is of more value.....it could be our time, our thoughts, our words, our feelings.

And when generous.....be generous with self too; because, what you can't do to yourself, is difficult to do for another.

There's neither order or priority to this, it's just about which ones will resonate, which ones talk to you......to me, it's my year end recap again.

While primary source for ahas is personal experience and conversation with friends, I'd like to add here thanks to Seth Godin, Maria Popova, Christa Tippett and Jason Gots for having been consistent thoughts provokers. These are all folks whose writings I subscribe to, who've in a sense replaced my newspaper......and I love that they are a part of life.

Travel '2018

It's like the easiest to start with......the quintessential low hanging fruit....least effort, fulfilling outcome :)

It's not about a travel recap.....it's travel itself that is like that. It just lends itself to so much positive. The new places, new experiences, the fun element, the adventure, meeting interesting people, widening of horizons, relationships and bonding, the learnings, the replenishment of energy.....I'm sure there's lots more that can get included in that list...but there's some components of it always there........maybe different proportions, yet in some way or the other.

And when you get to do travel like the kind you want, where you want, and with who you want.......well, that much more of all that :)

What a lovely quote....and how well it fits here

1. My year (read blog :) started with a flight back from Calcutta, catching a sunrise at 35000 feet.  Need I say more about that !

      

2. Pune : This was special, Dhruvas convocation when he graduated after an intense 5 year study of design and animation. Also made special as we had dad and mom who came along to be part of a moment that mattered.

3. Corbett, Uttarkhand :  This was a super fun, adventure and beautiful trip with Dhruva and Diksha. Had just about all the elements a great trip can have, just a tad overboard on the adventure, but that we're alive to tell the tale, says it all.

4.  Delhi : A family wedding....with harshitha's brilliant planning....it had at one time lots of solemnity and glitz...all the ceremonies, mehendi, wedding, reception, sangeet et all....and lots and lots of fun family time

5. Cherai, Cochin: A trip with Vishakha, which is slowly and wonderfully becoming an annual feature. Lots of just us time....walking, talking and being together. Means much.

6. Trissur: Beena's son's wedding, the first in our group. This is with her and her son Pranav.

7. Fort Kochi: While the visit was for Trissur, we got to do a day at Fort Kochi, thanks to Monu taking us around.

8. Munnar: This was just Diksha and me.... a first to a hill station in the monsoons....it was a lot of cloud and rain and walks and music, and bonus was being there on my birthday....beautiful and meaningful.

9. Hawai'i: Well, I've written twenty one posts on it, and yet not done, so not even trying to capture in a sentence. These pictures though say a lot....about how it is literally this 'island unto itself', and how on that island amidst the beauty and mystery that is Hawai'i, we had such wonderful family time.

10. Los Angeles: I haven't even gotten down to writing about LA. Now fully inspired to, once this year end recap is done. This one's with backdrop of the famed Hollywood sign...as Hollywood or as LA as it can get.

11. Bangalore: A quick trip to Bangalore for Dev uncles 80th birthday, a special trip.....also did what I love doing, a day bus.

 

12. Tirupathi: A mom and me trip.



And that's the list of the years travels..... twelve trips .... fully satiated on that score :)

Coffee and Ruminations

It's that time of year

A time when you want to look back... look back and see, what has been, how it's been, relive what you like, gather takeaways, recognize those you imbibed, reiterate the ones you still want to. So much possible rumination.

the prettiest cup of coffee I've had

Each of us approaches the turn of the year our own way, be it recap and introspective time...or wild party time ....or both, or somewhere in between......but there's no denying it's special. I've heard kids sitting on the beach, quite sloshed and recounting experiences of the year......after all we all follow the same calendar.

This is another big bonus of writing a blog........a nicely encapsulated space of the years experiences. 

You'd think you remember, but our mind can nicely skew things. A browse of the years archives, and trust me, I had my share of surprises.

I saw that I had done a fair amount of travel this year as well. Hawai'i was so big..like long wise and intense wise, that it had pushed other trips into background. Also saw that I'd gone pretty low on movies, and what's more, low on books as well. Had gotten on to some new projects...some picking up traction.....and some not. Like the railway time table....it's all at a glance.

I thought my highlights would be 'travel' and 'learnings'......and then saw how there were several beautiful experiences hidden there......the forever moments, the ones that add magic to life.

This post is like preface....will wait to see how the actual recap goes :)

Stones Back to Pele

If I say it was difficult sending the stones back, it would be such an understatement. They seemed to make it as difficult as they could.

The most obvious choice was to send them to kamlesh aunty, but she was travelling on a long trip out of Hawai'i. Then Bablu, try as I might, he consistently thought I was joking :)

I meanwhile wrote to the only other person I knew in Hawai'i, Beth Evasong. Beth I'd met at the farmer's market.  She  makes her own little glasswork artifacts, and I'd bought gifts for close friends from her, and we had a sweet conversation, and I had pictures of her, so I just hoped she'd recall. 

The story started with a mail titled 'an unusual request', being sent to her two months after the meet, and quickly receiving a lovely response. She not only said yes, but said she'd do a small prayer and an offering to Pele, the Goddess of the Volcanoes (and added that Pele likes cigarettes and gin :)

Then started the effort to send it.  Multiple visits to the Post Office; this post office to the other, each one saying it should be packed differently, then official sealing.... and the final straw was when all things done, the guy says, "it won't clear customs". Any explanation and he was like, "No".  I reached a point of, "if you can't show me the rule under which it can't go, you cant say No". He finally agreed, but said it would get sent back from Mumbai. At that point I could only appeal with "let's please try".

Beth had similar reservations about issues at US customs. Those were nail biting days, because if anything I didn't want them lost in between countries.

A happy day was the day I received a mail saying "lava back on island" with this picture, and her lovely sense of humour and profundity. She said "madam Pele thanks you for respecting her, but I can only imagine what the US customs thought when they inspected" .

And what was so touching was how she went on to making this a wow experience.

I'm putting here her mail alongwith a couple of pictures she sent me a week later. This is to keep for posterity a reminder of the entire experience.

Aloha Smitha,

We hiked out to lava flow near my house, called Kaloli Point, the most EAST tip of the big island. The lava is from early 1800’s. I made a small alter and placed the stones and coral then snapped a picture with nice wave spray.

Mahalo plenty for the beautiful shawl wrap! I treasure our little encounter and was happy to help with this request.
Wishing you much good fortune now that everything is back home.

Beth

What a lovely picture......the lovingly made altar ... the spray in backdrop, the black lava mountain by the sea, the huge and beautiful hibiscus (the national flower of Hawai'i), and the little stones. Such a beautiful closure to the whole experience. A hug to you Beth. 

Beth.....a picture that will stay etched in memory

Beth, like I'd said, our connection did not happen for nothing.....not the goosebumps you got when we first met at the farmers market, not the goosebumps I got through your gesture and these pictures, not the little altar you created for the stones and Pele.

For all you've done to help me with this.....mahalo, mahalo, and more mahalo. 

Back to Hawai'i

It's been a while, almost four months in fact since our return from Hawai'i, and I come back today to complete the chronicles of the experience. 

Suffice it to say.... Pele, the goddess of the volcanoes, knows why this gap.

Mysterious? Well, definitely Yes.

Diksha and Me at Maunakea, one of the largest volcanoes in Hawai'i

Let me tell a story that had got me stuck.....no easy one....in fact a story I'm not too comfortable to admit to. But trying to walk the talk .....accepting my vulnerable and iffy facets :)

Legend and folklore says that no volcanic stones from Hawai'i ought to be taken beyond the island.  And what do we do? what I did atleast, is pooh pooh folklore. In fact even rationalized it saying, Hawai'i is all about compassion, why would the goddess be so stuck. And I got myself a few little stones as souvenirs, unique and pretty ones I picked up from Maunakea, when our van broke down and we spent a couple hours just walking around the mountain, and a couple from kamlesh aunty.

We're back in Hyd, and getting into the routine of life. But no, couldn't get to routine. Pretty much went headlong into a difficulties and issues galore. Huge ones, nothing like the normal handelable ones....almost like life and death ones. Not one , not two, but like a series.

I was cracking up under the pressure, but didn't make the connect. Not until this call one evening, when a friend seemingly whispered "get an envelope... put those stones in.... go to the courier office ....".

I was stunned into silence. 

And then the dots started to connect. All the stories I'd heard...Vijji aunty saying "hope you didn't bring back stones from Hawai'i", the unlikelihood and extremity of the issues happening. The final thought being 'if i believe in energy and mystery, why am I resisting, why am i insisting on rationality?'.

I saw reason, or rather I accepted I don't need to see reason. Just surrender to the mysterious laws of energy....even if through folklore, or maybe that's where they really sit.

Between August to now, trust me, life's done a U turn .....it's gone from crazy mad difficult to beautiful wonderful brilliant. 

The story of how the stones went back is fascinating in itself, will write :)

An Experience of Time

Guess (re)connecting of any kind by very definition happens as a consequence to some kind of a disconnect.

Context is the blog.....I've been away for a while now. This time round it's been for as objective and constructive a reason as can be ( exams :).

I love to blog, no two ways on that. Each time I write, which is aspirationally on daily basis, I love the process, I love what it enables, I love the flow, I love the learning .....yes, there's that many loves there.

Yet, yet getting back after a break is always a process. And I find that strange.... an alluring strange.

Why does it take effort to get back to even what we love doing?

It's no longer about time. It's about finding the connect....the right energy. That feeling of being 'more put together'.

We are such creatures of habit, so used to falling into the life of default, of detail, of neutral gear....... so used to a space that's neither dissonant nor reverberating, that to shift that gear, takes something....likely clarity and effort.

To do good even by ourselves is no easy path.....it's conscious effort. This reminds me of 'Flow by Mihaly Csikszentmihalyi , where he talks of the best moments not as the normal or leisure moments which are passive, receptive, relaxing but moments when your body or mind are stretched to its limits in a voluntary effort to accomplish something difficult and worthwhile, not so difficult that it builds anxiety, but also not so easy that it can get boring, its the band in between...... and they are the moments that add up to 'magnifying ones spirit'. And that's where we grow and enhance the quality of our lives.

We each need to find what that something is that enables that shift of gear.....the one that let's you get on the path of optimum.

Why?

Because it's just so worth it :)

A Music Gig

An evening of 'blues' music.

Yest when Diksha called around eight and said "want to come for a music gig ma?", my first question was "what kind of music?". She said 'Blues'.... I wasn't too sure what that was, and by way of explanation she said "It's kind of Jazzy, folksy, I think it's music you'll like, want to come?". 

I went....for what turned out to be a lovely night.

It was the 'By2Blues' from Bangalore, playing at Tabula Rasa. Lovely ambience, fun atmosphere, a high energy band, and absolutely lovely music. 

Tabula Rasa (this ones from google, was too dark by the time we went)

By2Blues, Ananth Menon their lead singer and guitarist, Joe Anthony on the Cajon, and Vasudev Prabhu playing the harmonica. They're each brilliant at what they do, yet Vasudev on the harmonica was like a man possessed....adding one lingering and haunting element to the music.

Some of the songs they played were Super Star in my car, urban VIP, Devils got the wheel, On the road again, Idukki Gold, When I die, and Current affair, among many others.

Tabula Rasa is all pretty much outdoors, and lovelier for it...tried capturing some of the feel of the place, but it was too dark.

A couple of video clips

End of evening...Diksha with some friends, Aditya, Lashya and Mayur

Diksha with the inevitable doggy moment ...playing with a stray outside, as we were leaving

A picture that Shitabh, their official photographer got and sent Diksha this morning (he was also their official photographer when they did Infinite Cartwheel gigs). Dhruv,( a friend of Dikshas right from school),  Mayur, (he and Diksha were the Infinite cartwheels team), Me and Diksha.

Diksha and Mayur, thanks for having me join you guys for that lovely evening... totally loved it !

Mother - Daughter Trips

Why is this even a 'thing' to write about?

Well, because I figured it had become a 'thing' in my life. It's grown so subtly and organically that it's not until yesterday that I saw how it's etched it's own space in our lives. With my mother, and with my daughter....mom and me trips, and the Diksha and me trips.

Couple days back Mom and I happened to watch a movie together, Dhadak.....and while we both enjoyed the movie, what came out is also "Chalo, lets do a trip to Udaipur" (movie is mostly based out of Udaipur)

Yesterday was her birthday....so it became this more special thought.....and that's what set me thinking on the journey (pun intended)

My first mom daughter trip, was just Diksha and me, taking off on a road trip to Bidar, five years back that was. That was the testing of waters trip. Folks in the family was quite  naturally concerned, especially as it was a road trip. 

Justifiably so too........first trip we not only got lost...it was pouring like crazy, off the highway.....a kuccha road, totally isolated, gps wouldn't work, no phone connectivity........ we eventually manage to reach the resort to find it's in the middle of nowhere, and we're the only occupants there. Have to admit we spent a tense and scary first day there...and it did put me through times I could have kicked myself. 

But then, each time we overcame such obstacles it only made our resolve firmer and possibilities wider.  You learn that 'risk taking'  is a relative and flexible capability, one driven more by fear than knowledge. As your fear drops, your horizon stretches.

Bidar was just the beginning. We've both since done trips to Coorg, Pondicherry, Coonoor, Munnar, Ajmer, Ooty.......and most of them road trips, which is a whole different experience in itself. Each enabling the breaking of more barriers. For instance, I'd always believed I couldn't drive the ghats....was so wonderful to be proved wrong.

And then with mom, that was a new start too, an inspired start. Just mom and me have done Tirupathi, and Amritsar...and one to Goa (with vijji aunty too) .......each bringing out different facets of experience. Guess it's from there that the now inspiration for Udaipur comes.

Each of those trips enables a deepening of not just external frontiers, but internal ones as well. The experiences touching emotional spaces that etch the relationship with something texturally rich .....like weaving of an exotic tapestry. 

It's this realization, and the gratitude for having been able to do so many 'duo' trips with my mother, and with my daughter that made me want to give it it's own special space.

Some pictures from these trips that the recall rekindled:

Bidar

Pondicherry

Coorg

Goa

Coonoor

 Amritsar

Munnar, more recently. I can almost see Diksha grow from a girl to be looked after, into a woman who can stand shoulder to shoulder ( or a few inches more :) through these pictures....

This one is special.....with Nandi (our car got christened by Diksha on this trip).....loyal companion on so many road trips

Ma, and Diksha.......hard to find words to say just how much these trips are cherished. Get set for Udaipur ma, your casual thought has taken seed :)

Down nostalgia lane

A meet up with a friend and colleague from twenty years back.

When Aditi called and said "Hey, I've just landed in Hyd, I have one evening free, can we catch up?". While I had visitors at home, and a whole bunch of things lined up, I heard myself saying "yes, we definitely could".

And we did....... and what's more, at one of my favouritest places.....JNIDB

It was a journey down nostalgia lane, in more ways than one. One was recalling some amazing stories from working together as a team, one that broke records at work, all of twenty years back. It's rarely that you'll get paired with someone who will match you wavelength by wavelength, be it in thought, energy, innovation, process, commitment.....and we just had all of that going for us. 

I remember being called the 'live wire team'. While I moved out of IDBI a long while back, she's stayed and grown, rung by rung, and is now Chief General Manager. It made me just so proud to see her there, rubbing shoulders with the EDs and CGMs. So so deserved. 

While our six years together was in Bangalore, another connect we discovered we both had is with JNIDB itself.  She was involved with it's creation on paper at Head Office, while I was involved with it's creation and and starting process here in Hyderabad. And we both have an equally strong attachment with it . 

It could be that which inspired us to walk around the campus, in the quiet of the evening, catching up with so many stories. And her saying "if ever IDBI sells JNIDB, I will resign". That's a whole different level of identification...such an emotionally intense statement, that it endeared me to her enough to create a forever moment.

Apart from the work angle, I have another nice story. Inspired by the architecture (it's a Charles Correa creation), and the widespread grounds, I'd told the then CGM that it would be lovely to have geese walking around the campus, and he'd said " if you can bring them, I'll keep them".

A casual thought that got fulfilled. One Sunday, I went to Charminar, bought six geese and drove them in the back seat of my car all the way to JNIDB. It's so deeply touching to see that they still have geese, though the ED now was quick to tell me "these are new, they may not be the ones you bought" :)

The driveway in

We did a lot of walking around, and came in for some chai and pakodas in between

A quadrangle within, where we've spent many a night singing and talking into early hours of the morning

In the room, Aditi was sweet enough to pose for me

Another picture

The geese pen

This was an absolute coup. I googled JNIDB to see if I'd get some other pictures of it's architecture, and was so blown to find this picture, one of the very few group pictures there........one from 1991, and with me in it (third from left)

@Aditi, is that you in green, not sure as this would be years before I'd known you....but if yes, this would be a mind blowing coincidence

Aditi, it was so wonderful meeting and catching up, and to your caption in the picture you sent saying "thanks for coming, I will treasure these moments", an absolute ditto ......so glad I came, and will treasure those moments as much, and more.

What's in a word

"What's in a name".............Shakespeare would have us be nicely poetic and idealistic.

We now know that's way more contextual than what we'd like to believe. Studies have evidenced that  'words' do influence our thoughts, and the meaning we make out of the situation, person, event etc

A small instance of how this works:

I have some flowers and plants in the house, and they've evoked reactions interesting enough to tell a story.....

"so pretty.....fake hai? artificial kyon re?"

"you gave artificial flowers for his birthday?" (one of those bunches was a gift for dad)

"are those real"? (some are). Which ones are real? it would be so pretty if they were all real"

Just in the use of the words 'artificial' 'synthetic' and 'fake', there's this feeling of belittling, of being imposter, of letting down. So much nuances.

It helps to ask the 'Why'? Why have them? What is the objective?

Is the idea to pass them off as real? or is it to add prettiness?

And lo and behold ! you have your answer and you love them a little more :)

In this context there's a quote of  Jean-Luc Godard which says it beautifully : 

“It’s not where you take things from - it’s where you take them to."

A Little Refresher

This is excerpts of something simple and sweet, that came into my inbox this morning......

None of it may be new, in some form or the other, we've read, been told.....but one thing I learnt from my Google days "repetition doesn't spoil the prayer".

It's as good as that refreshing cup of coffee each morning, definitely beats the newspaper :)

5 “Notes to Self” About the Precious Little Time You Have Left

WRITTEN by MARC CHERNOFF 

1. Your entire life can be customized from day to day.

There are hundreds of people in every town on Earth who live their entire lives on the default settings, never realizing they can customize everything. Don’t be one of them. Don’t settle for the default settings in life.

The life you create from doing something that moves and excites you is far better than the life you get from sitting around wishing you were doing it.

2. The willingness to do hard things makes life worth living.

Truth be told, one of the most important abilities you can develop in life is the willingness to accept and grow through life’s challenges and discomforts. Because the best things are often hard to come by, and if you shy away from hard work and discomfort, you’ll miss out on them entirely. 

3. Opportunity is only ever found in the present.

Some people wait all day for 5pm, all week for Friday, all year for the holidays, all their lives for happiness and peace. Don’t be one of them. The secret to happiness and peace is letting this moment be what it is, instead of what you think it should be.

4. Daily kindness is a beautiful legacy to leave behind.

Through kindness you have the ability to make a profound difference in every life you touch, including your own.  So just keep reminding yourself that you will end up terribly disappointed if you expect people will always do for you as you do for them.  

5. Everything will change again, faster and sooner than expected.

Nothing lasts. Everything changes. Day to day is a winding journey.

As human beings we are constantly outgrowing what we once thought we couldn’t live without, and falling in love with what we didn’t even know we wanted. Life literally keeps leading us on journeys we would never go on if it were up to us. Don’t be afraid. Find the lessons. Trust the journey.

To a greater or lesser extent, we all know deep down that life is short, and that our mortality—our inevitable demise—will catch up to each and every one of us eventually. And yet we are infinitely surprised when it catches up to somebody we know. 

It’s like walking up a long flight of stairs with a distracted mind and miscalculating the final step. You expected there to be one more stair than there is, but there isn’t, and so you find yourself off balance, tripping over yourself for a while, until your mind shifts back to the present moment and the reality of how life really is.

Let’s take a deep breath right now and take this to heart.

Bucket List

My first Marathi movie without subtitles, so an additional interesting experience.

As surface level, a journey of finding identity and self.....and at a deeper level, exploring the invisible and subtle connection and bond between the living and the dead, an organ recipient and a donor. 

Madhura (Madhuri Dixit) a middle aged housewife, whose life revolves around taking care of her family, is the recipient of a heart transplant, and while her family is joyous....she finds herself ruminating on what the emotions in the donors family might be. 

Her thoughts take her not just to the doorstep of the family, but to completing the bucket list of her twenty year old heart donor. Through learning to ride an Enfield, kissing a boyfriend in public, learning to wolf whistle and more.......... and how through the process she goes from being wife, daughter, mother, daughter in law, to becoming Madhura. 

And in process endears herself into her donors circle, and enables closure for the girl's twin brother, parents (Renuka Sahane and Phatak) and friends. 

While there are several facets of the film you feel could have been better, Madhuri Dixit carries  the film pretty much on her own, and enables a simple and heart warming watch.

@Surekha, thanks for getting me to watch, especially for saying "chuck the subtitles, you'll follow the Marathi" 

Another Second Hand Book Bazaar Visit

This visit to the book bazaar happened on a perfectly timed impulse.

Sunday morning, Swaroop and I are chatting up over our second cup of coffee. He's talking of Yuvah Noval Harari, and asking if I've read him, ....and says "you keep quoting Bill Bryson, if Bill Bryson does it casually and with humour, this guy does it seriously....you should definitely read him, start with 'Sapiens'....I think you'll love it". 

It suddenly occurred that this was a Sunday morning..... just perfect. Within a couple of hours, we were at Abids.

What completed the circle of perfectly timed was that I actually found a copy of the 'Sapiens' on that footpath, for a hundred bucks :)

Walking around, looking at book titles, known and not known, picking up random books, sharing experiences when paths cross......always an enriching and interesting experience.

In pictures:

Praveen picking up stuff

Swaroop, picking up stuff

Rafeez......I had to get him in picture. I ask if he has 'games people play', and he's like "Eric Berne ka madam? I was so blown 

  

I actually picked up a ten rupee book, a Victoria Holt who was one of my favourites during school

I'm saying "It's quite hot isn't it?" ....I'm fully ignored. And then Swaroop replies after like six minutes, so engrossed that it took that long for him to even register my question :). So off I went by myself for a bathai juice respite.

Two cute little kids who were quite happily waiting as their father browsed books

Swaroop and me

 This parking lot always amazes me, just to have such a massive empty site in the middle of abids.

Back home , Swaroop with his chilled beer, made more enjoyable after the visit. It looks like he's actually reading a synopsis on the floor :) 

Our haul for the day, Praveen's, Swaroops and Mine. Was fun to go through back home, as we each didn't know what the other had bought.

An interesting titbit...... Swaroop recalling that his first ever book was what I'd bought him in his 9th class.... 'The Other Side of Midnight' by Sidney Sheldon... and saying that's what had had set him off into reading. Felt so good, though beats me why I'd have anyone start with Sidney Sheldon, that too in school :)